First OB Visit

Well, I had my first "official" OB visit yesterday. Woo hoo! I haven't made it this far, in a very long time! I was a nervous wreck, of course since this was a big deal for me. Even though we have already seen the baby's heartbeat, I have still been a little worried. This just all seems too good to be true. Anyways, we get to the appointment, and I am trying to remain calm relaxed. I called, and weighed(only 1lb gain so far, not too bad), and we go into the exam room. After waiting a few minutes for the doctor to come in, I start to feel like I need to use the restroom, but since I just used it prior to give my urine sample, I don't really worry about it too much. The doctor comes in and starts to do the ultrasound. He isn't talking, or taking pictures. I am starting to freak out a little bit. Then he tells me that my bladder is full so he can't really see anything(it is a transvaginal u/s). So, I'll need to use the restroom again. He leaves the room and I start to get dressed asking Josh what he saw on the ultrasound screen. The screen was turned away from me towards the doctor and Josh was sitting in a chair over by him, so he would have been able to see the screen. He tells me he couldn't see anything. I'm like ,"What? There was nothing there?". Then he says, "I don't know, but there was nothing there". Now, I'm starting to panic and think, "This is not happening again!". I use the restroom and use all my power to make sure my bladder is completely empty. I get back in the exam room, and the doctor comes in and starts the ultrasound again. I can hear him clicking buttons and taking pictures this time, but he still isn't saying anything! I can not breathe at this point. Then finally he asks Josh to come over by me so he can show us both at the same time. The moment of truth. Then he shows our little baby!!! Whew...sigh of relief. Our cute little baby(which resembled a gummy bear this time instead of a bean), looked perfect and had a nice strong heartbeat of 156 BPM. I am in tears at this point. But, it is measuring four days smaller(so did the u/s a few weeks ago at the perinatologist), so my due date has been pushed back. I also will not be able to deliver via VBAC at the hospital I want to deliver at, so I will be having a scheduled C-section. I have mixed feelings on that, but the only hospital that will let me do a VBAC, is not where I want to deliver. I just really don't want to be away from Emma for four days! But, it will be easier for Josh to schedule his vacation for the same time, so I guess it will have to do. I am on Cloud 9, and feel like I'm finally getting my happy ending! I guess fairy tales sometimes do come true!

Genetic Counselor Appointment

So, yesterday we had our appointment with the Genetic Counselor, and it went pretty well. First of all, my doctor told me wrong and it's not a balanced translocation that Josh carries, but a paracentric inversion. It is still a chromosomal abnormality, but totally different. It only involves one of his chromosomes(4), and even though it still has a very high risk for a miscarriage, it's not as high as the balanced translocation, so that's good. I won't really go into detail what exactly the paracentric inversion is, but it is still that he is perfectly healthy and it poses no health risk to him and only affects his sperm cells. But, the Genetic Counselor was really nice and went over everything with us and answered any questions. It was also nice to have more information. It was a little reality check though being in an office that says right on the door "High Risk OB". It's official. I will be seeing the Perinatalogist(spelling?) throughout my pregnancy along with my regular OB.
So, after we talked with the Genetic Counselor, she asked me if I have had any ultrasounds with this pregnancy so far. I told her, no. So she suggested that I have an ultrasound so that the pregnancy can be dated, and all that. Ok...panic attack! I was not prepared for the possibilty of an ultrasound at all! Luckily, I was not alone, Josh was with me. Last year, I was alone in the doctor's office when I found out I had lost my baby, not a good feeling. Anyways, Josh is trying to reassure me that everything is going to be fine. I have been having morning sickness and we have all been praying like crazy! We go into the ultrasound room, and the tech starts asking me a few questions. It is actually kind of nice already being in a high risk ob, because she is used to people like me. I am not a "normal" pregnant woman anymore. I have lost more pregnancies than I have delivered. Anyways, she tells me that she wants to take a few pics transabdominally, but that since I'm only 7 weeks along, we will see the baby better with a transvaginal ultrasound. That is fine with me, since my bladder is already about to burst! I told her the most important thing for me to see is my little baby's heartbeat. She understands and starts the ultrasound. I seriously can not breath at this point, and then she says the most wonderful words I have ever heard in my life, "I see a heartbeat!". Yes!!! Praise God!!! Butterbean, as we have been referring to him(or her), had a wonderful strong heartbeat of 125 BPM!!!! I am so unbelievably happy right now. I have been through so much to get to this point, and had doubts that this would ever really happen. So now it's official...we are having a baby!
The timing is ironic, since it has been almost a year exactly that I found out I had lost my baby. It was March 10, 2008, that my whole world was turned upside down. Since then we lost another pregnancy, and I had pretty much given up when we found out we were expecting again on Valentine's Day. Then, just about a week later we got the devastating news that my husband carries a chromosome abnormality. It has been such a roller coaster ride, and I'm sure it will continue, but at least now I can relax a bit that this baby is healthy. God is good! When I stopped trying to control the situation myself, and gave it all to Him, it is AMAZING what happened! He blessed us!!!! I truly am feeling amazingly blessed at this moment. Emma is so excited to be a big sister that she is talking about in her sleep! No joke...the other night at around 3am, I heard her saying in her sleep twice, "I'm going to be a big sister!", and then nothing. She has also been talking to the baby through my belly. It is too cute.
I have my first OB appointment on the 16th, and I'll be just about 9 weeks and I'll get another ultrasound. Then, on April 13, I'll go back to the Perinatalogist and have a First Trimester screening(blood work with an ultrasound). The only sort of genetic testing I want in this pregnancy is bloodwork and ultrasounds. I already told them I am not doing anything invasive. I told them I am not doing an amniocentisis(spelling?), or a CVS. I am NOT going to risk miscarrying a healthy baby! I am not worried about birth defects since more than likely if something was wrong with the baby, it is never even viable(that's why I always have miscarried early).
But, we are so thrilled that this baby is healthy and can't wait to meet him or her. Now, I just need to get through the next 4 or 5 weeks, then I can REALLY relax!