Saturday, July 4, 2009

24 Weeks...

Well, I can't believe I am already 24 weeks pregnant! Time is really starting to fly by...and I just hope it continues this way. Of course, there still is so much left to do and buy, but I'm getting so excited to meet this little guy! I am now finishing up my 2nd trimester, and life is going pretty good. Physically though, this pregnancy is already starting to take it's toll. I am only in my 6th month, and yet I feel like I am about 8 months. My back hurts, my hips ache, and I can only do about 30 minutes of shopping before I need to sit down and take a break. I am having horrible heartburn already, and I'm starting to worry a little bit about how I am going to make it through the 3rd trimester. Don't get me wrong, I'm not trying to complain, even with all these uncomfortable side effects, I LOVE being pregnant!! Mostly, I'm a little shocked to be so uncomfortable already. I'm not sure if it's just this particular pregnancy, or if it's because it is my 4th and my body has been through this so many times. But either way, I feel as big as a house already, and still have a ton of growing left to do!
Speaking of growing, I am now up 15lbs. Yikes! Although that is exactly as much I am supposed to gain at this point, because I already started out a little overweight, I was hoping to hardly gain anything. Of course, I knew that wasn't going to happen. But, I am gaining it very slow and steady, and hoping it will continue this way. I weigh myself just about every 2 or 3 days to stay on track, so I don't go off course too much. In my other pregnancies, I didn't start gaining anything until this time, and then gained it all in the last trimester(about 30lbs with the last two, 40lbs with the first). I am hoping that I still won't gain a ton in the last trimester on top of what I have already gained!! I'm not worried though. I need to just enjoy it, because once I have the baby, I will be working my butt off getting back into shape. With turning 30 around the corner, looking good and being healthy have become more of a priority that ever. I'm going to have two small children to run after, I better be ready!
As the reality that we will finally be having another baby sets in, so have some emotions that I haven't felt in a while. A part of this still feels to good to be true, and I guess that is to be expected considering what I have been through. I have come close to bursting into tears while on the Stork Tour of the hospital, and I actually shed a few while Josh and I were registering for my baby shower. I just feel so unbelievably blessed, that I don't even know what to do with myself! I already love this boy so very much, and feel such a strong connection to him. He is my miracle baby. He is the baby I never thought I would have. I just can not wait to hold him in my arms! Emma is also starting to feel a little bond with him. She is always coming over to my belly and telling him hi and that she loves him and can't wait to meet him. She will kiss and hug my belly. It is just so cute. I honestly feel that this was the baby I was meant to have, and at this time. It just feels so right.
Well, Kellen, is becoming very active, and now Josh and the kids can feel him kicking too! It is so reassuring to feel him moving all the time, and let's me know that he is doing good. I had wanted to rent a fetal doppler in the beginning, so I could check his heartbeat every day and lessen my worries about miscarrying again, but now, I'm glad that I didn't. Especially after learning I had an anterior placenta, which is why event the doctor had a hard time finding it at 14weeks. I would have made myself worry for nothing. I also have finally decided on where(and how) to have this baby!! It is such a huge relief since I have been going over this ever since I was 8weeks along and found out i couldn't do a VBAC at the hospital where I had Emma. So, after touring the other hospital, and praying about it night after night, I decided to just go ahead with a repeat c-section. I know some people will be disappointed with my decision since a vaginal delivery is so much better, but I know I am making the right decision for me. If I could be guaranteed a vaginal, that would be a different story. But as I saw with Emma's delivery, there is no guarantee when it comes to the labor process! I just am not willing to risk needing a c-section anyways and not being in my hospital of choice. I am nervous about recovering from surgery while taking care of a newborn and almost 4 year old, but I know I can do it. I will family to help, and Josh will be home for a few days. I wish he could take more off, but I know that there are still bills to pay!
So, while this pregnancy might be my most uncomfortable yet, I wouldn't change it for anything. I have never loved, or appreciated being pregnant so much in my entire life! I am going to thoroughly enjoy these last few months, even if I'm in pain and bedridden, because are the very last few months I will ever be pregnant again.