I think it's time...

Lately I have been thinking a lot about trying again for another baby. I feel I am now at the point where my desire to have a baby is greater than my fear of losing another one. I am a woman on a mission! I am determined to make the next pregnancy stick! Or at least, I will do my part. We are hoping to finally go and get all our testing done next week. The doctor feels everything will come back normal, but at least we will know for sure if there is a cause for these miscarriages. One thing that the doctor is pretty sure about is that it is somehow related to Josh, since I didn't have any miscarriages with my ex. He doesn't think that there is something "wrong" with him, but more like us as a combination. He feels that maybe my body is for some reason fighting off Josh's babies, so to speak. Having had high blood pressure when I was pregnant with Emma is also an indication. Regardless, I am optimistic that we can and will have another baby! One treatment option that has shown some success in these type of situations is baby aspirin and progesterone supplements. It's one of those things that can't hurt, and might help. I am all for it!
There is a possibility that maybe my body has just changed. I was reading an article about the recent birth of Lisa Marie Presley's twin girls. In it she stated that she had suffered many miscarriages after having two kids years ago(they are now teenagers) and didn't know why. She later found out that over time her blood had thickened, causing blood clots, and that was the cause. She was put on blood thinners, and conceived her twins quickly after that. Her story really gave me hope! It is possible(and highly likely) that is what is going on with me, although who knows why. Of course, I am not a doctor and I am not trying to diagnose myself, but it does help to hear success stories. I am pretty much certain that it is some sort of blood clotting issue since the only successful pregnancy I have had with Josh did consist of high blood pressure, which my doctor said goes along with a blood clotting issue. All this I will discuss with my doctor after he gets all my tests results, and we know for sure if there is anything going on. Who knows? Maybe we've just had "bad luck" and we just need to keep trying. Regardless, I WILL have a baby at the end of this! I'm not sure how many more miscarriages I will have to endure(hopefully none), but I will keep trying. I know that is what I am supposed to do. It just feels right.
So, in the meantime, I am trying to get my body healthier. Caffeine and alcohol are both linked to miscarriage, so I am going to cut those out completely. The alcohol shouldn't be an issue. I usually only drink about once every few weeks or so as it is, and I can just take a hot bath to give the same effect as that glass(or two) of wine. But the caffeine....now that is going to be a whole different story! I have a serious coffee addiction! I don't drink a lot of coffee, just maybe one or two cups a day, but I get some serious withdrawals when I don't have any. I get cranky, irritable, and a headache that lasts for 3 days. It is horrible, so I am just going to try to wean myself off slowly. For my family's sake, more so than mine! I'm adding more physical activity to my day, to help me lose a few pound first, and to keep me healthier overall. I have never stopped taking prenatal vitamins, so I am going to continue taking those. I also am taking extra folic acid, and vitamins B6, B12, C, and E, along with the baby aspirin.
So, I am sending positive thoughts out into the universe, and letting nature take it's course. It will happen when it's meant to, even if it is not on my time table. Apparently, that seems to be they way everything that is worth it in my life goes! I guess God really does know what's best for me, and I know when the time is right, He will work His miracle!